Lately, almost every time I suggest something, Mighty says something different.

Want to clean your room at 4:00? She immediately says 4:30. What movie are we watching Friday night? She says let’s watch it on Saturday.

And on and on. It feels like a constant negotiation.

Earlier in the day, she told me she wanted Chinese food. So when I was about to leave, I asked what she wanted from the restaurant. Actually, she now wanted pizza.

I felt hot. Like temperature hot. This too much. The only reason why I’m even getting Chinese is because you wanted it and I’m trying to take your suggestions seriously. Nope. You can’t get your way ALL the time.

I’m having a mini-tantrum in my head. And it spilled over. What I said was, not so nicely, “Unh uh. I’m getting Chinese. Didn’t you tell me earlier that’s what you wanted?”

She says, “Oh…yeah…well I thought it was your idea.”

“So if it’s my idea, you always gonna say something different?”

“Yeah…something like that.”

She’s sheepish because she’s probably worried about my response and/or (hopefully) realizing a thing about herself. I’m real irritated. I say, “Duly noted,” grab my keys and walk out the door.

And it was duly noted – she’s testing me. She’s testing boundaries to see when her voice will be heard and if I’m really going to take her ideas seriously. She be trying to eek out every bit of control where possible and I’m like, dang, let me get situated first.

But the main thing is – it ain’t really personal. Things have been shifting around here and she’s trying to see if it’s a real thing. Knowing that will help me deal with it better. I hope.

#deschooling #deschoolingoutloud #unschooling #consciousparenting